Am I wrong to want to exclude family from the wedding?

here's the deal, my dad's family and I aren't close, we never get together, and I pretty much think they're jerks, except for a few of them, and they probably have the same opinion of me which is fine. I told my parents that when my fiance and I get married that I would prefer not to even invite the family and use the money I would have spent on feeding them on improving the details, like having a more expensive dinner served and a more expensive dress, just overall a more extravagant small elegant wedding. My mom said that was very selfish of me, but I don't really see why I should invite these people I have nothing to do with and only see every couple of years if that. I was planning on inviting a couple of them, but my mom said that I couldn't invite a couple and exclude the rest. Why not it's my wedding right? What would you do and am I way out of line? My parents are mainly paying for the wedding and reception, but I will help out a little too.
I just don't know why my mom was annoyed, b/c for one it's my dad's family I'm talking about cutting out, and for two they barely talk to them either
yes the majority of them live in the same town as us
my parents are still together and they are both obviously going to be at the wedding and very much involved in the planning too
alright for those of you calling me a "spoiled brat" here's just a tame example of the people I don't want to invite, my cousin and I are both of Facebook I saw her profile, sent a very nice email asking how her and the kids were, with a friend req, she blocked me, and never bothered to respond. My grandma at every family function she attends manages to make it all about her and to cause some kinda of tension/disagreement between everyone within minutes of arriving. I do understand that family is important, I love my parents and my mom's family dearly-I just don't want to worry about having to feel worried that something is going to go down or that people are critizing me behind my back at my own wedding. That is why I am considering not inviting those people and yes putting the money towards other things


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Even if you don't like them or see them it is still polite to invite them. If they don't like you they don't have to come. If they live near by you should invite them. If not...just hope they won't come. If your parents are paying for it you should fill this one request they have.

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very selfish of you?

YOU ARE THE BRIDE! ITS YOUR WEDDING!!!!!

its not selfish, its selfish of her to try to make you do things and have things at ur wedding that you dont want.

shit, when I get married I'm not letting anyone put their two sense in above my own.

is ur mom the one getting married? No.

i rest my case.


and congrats! and good luck!

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surely you should invite them too especially if their paying for the wedding !!! YOU HAVE TO , PLEASE DONT MAKE A MISTAKE .. This will change everything if you wont ,youll be building a whole circle of hatred and even your friends will tell you this.
Be more positive to it !

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You sound like a brat.

If people in your family want to come and wish you a happy marriage, they shouldn't be restricted from that.

FYI, I'm certain that they think you're a jerk too.

fs

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Time to forgive. Be the bigger person. If they don't want to come they don't have to come. You shouldn't be the b*tch and exclude them. You can't undo it. For the rest of your marriage they will know they were never invited. It will be even harder for you to mend the wounds.

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family is family, whether you like them or not. It's never too late to improve relationships and a wedding can be the event that begins the bridge building process!

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I think they should be invited.
If there is no real closeness, they may opt to not come. If they are truly "jerks" they may feel that they don't want to give you a gift, so they will distance themselves from the whole thing.
However, if they attend,be cordial.
Actually, you will probably be so busy with other things and other peoople that you won't notice if they are or are not present.

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gah, it's your wedding, not your moms. Its not a show or a family reunion. Do what you want-it is your once in a lifetime special day. Congratulations!

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Elope! problems will go away!

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